Find out if you are going through an existential crisis and learn to overcome it

There are moments in life when you are not motivated, nothing is interesting to you and you wonder why you are here, what your purpose really is. You feel lost, you see that the world goes on and the people around you advance and you find yourself burdened without knowing what to do. The good news is that this feeling is much more common than you think and you can get out of it. Dafne Cataluña, psychologist and founder of the European Institute of Positive Psychology, points out that this feeling is more frequent in people who are over 40 or 50 years old and even in retirement. Here you do a reading of life and you see that it has passed too quickly, without having dedicated time to what is really important to you. Before, they think more about achievement, development and learning, but later other types of vital aspects such as family are valued more. This has also been influenced by the pandemic, as it has meant a great change in our day-to-day lives, which has led in many cases to rethink whether we are doing what we really want. For example, there are people who used to dedicate much of their time to work and thought that seeking recognition from their superior made them happy. However, they now value eating with their family at home and the moments derived from it more. Or being able to dedicate more space to reading if it is someone who loves to learn. Thing that if we spend hours and hours reviewing work documents, we have neither time nor energy to do this later, “explains this psychologist. How to get out of this situation? Catalonia points out that the simplest, fastest and most accessible thing is to work on personal strengths. It is about identifying what you are good at and what makes you enjoy to apply it in your life. If what you are immersed in does not allow you to activate your personal strengths, you can look for another alternative in which you can exploit them. For this, an evaluation battery and an interview are usually carried out that allows the person to know what they are good at and what makes them happy. Other times there is a blindness of strengths, because yes you are putting them into operation, but you do not realize it and you are only left with a negative reading of the situation. This occurs because you are not aware of your strengths, you do not see them because you have hardly ever worked on them. «They educate us to learn skills, abilities that I have not acquired, they teach me and I develop. They usually instruct us that what we do wrong is where we have to put the most effort and this approach does not favor us enjoying what we do, because it is all effort, all imposition, “explains this psychologist. On the other hand, the strengths approach makes you look for what in addition to being good, you enjoy, because it can converge. And that’s where you will get to feel better about what you do. One of the most common problems is considering life according to what is expected of us and not from what is truly relevant to one. «When we want to feel that our life is going where we want it to be, that it is more self-directed, it is recommended to work on intrinsic motivation, which is to find what is relevant to me, but perhaps not to others. And sometimes that means not following the standards that have marked me, ”says Catalonia. An example would be studying what your parents impose on you, even though you don’t like it. In this case – Catalonia describes – you would be trying to avoid a difficult conversation for which you do not feel prepared. However, you have to do an exercise of courage and get out of the ‘box’, because if you don’t, you will find yourself locked in a decision that will weigh you down for a long time.

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